Matt Smith’s Doctor Who is very this season. But shouldn’t a Time Lord be above all that?

Hey, check out the new Burberry model, hanging out in the VIP section of Glastonbury, en route to meet Emma Watson and Pixie Geldof. Oh no, wait a fashion moment minute – it’s Matt Smith, the all-new Doctor Who, on set in Cardiff.

I’m going to be honest here: I hate this look. Hate it. And I’m going to be even more honest: I hate it largely because it is not worn by David Tennant, who I adored so much as Doctor Who that it is possible part of my admiration had less to do with his thespian (and style) skills, and a lot more to do with me having unprofessional feelings for him.

But even aside from that quibble, I hate this outfit because it commits the ultimate fashion crime: it is trying too hard. It is a patchwork of “Grazia told me this is very fashionable right now” looks, and that is just wrong. A Time Lord should not read Grazia.

DM boots and all their lookalike cousins have, incredibly, been having what magazines insist on calling a “comeback” for some time, mainly on the basis that Agyness Deyn likes them. The shortened trousers are the signature style of the perennially trendy menswear designer, Thom Browne. Thanks to the joyless likes of Pharrell Williams, bow ties are very in now but, like, ironically (that sound you hear is the sound of style dying) and, yes, you can buy them at American Apparel. Of course you can.

Give the man a tweed jacket, top the whole shebang off with some posh boy big hair and – badda bing, badda boom – we have a fashion pin-up, made by committee.

True, some of the blame for this debacle must lie at the feet of my beloved Tennant because he made Doctor Who a fashion icon, with his tweedy suits and Converse trainers. But that was done with a light touch, this one is done by sledgehammer. And the end result is Indiana Jones on his day off, with an added dash of Grazia.